Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Not the blog I was going to post

This is not the blog I planned on posting today, but a set of circumstances were set into motion that I could not let pass without commenting, or making a commentary on the ills of our strange world.

My daughter is involved with competitive cheer leading. It's an activity she really enjoys and her life in enriched by this activity, which is what I like. Besides developing herself socially, she is also developing physically, and it keeps her in shape and social which is what I love. Wednesdays have become the day that Audrey and I get to spend together with just she and I.

I have made comments before on this blog what it is like to be at cheer practice. The cheer mom's that are living through their children, the constant critiquing of all their practices, but nothing prepared me for the experience that happened today.

Audrey and I walked through the door about 10 minutes before practice to a smell that is all together different. To describe it, I would to tell you; to get a replica of this smell is to walk through the hospice ward of your local nursing home. The smell was revolting. Much like rotting flesh or the smell of a dead body that was left in a home after a week. It permeates you clothing, concrete, and pretty much anything else that you could think of. It was almost an instant eye watering.

I walked down the hall to what I affectionately call the observation deck. Its a set of windows that looks into the gym so we can watch, and not interfere with practice. We can see progress, and not try and coach from the bleachers. The smell had not made its way towards the observation deck, so I figured it was a problem with the plumbing or something and decided that the smell was only by the door, near the bathroom. I'm sure coach had it taken care of. As more and more parents showed up, the smell just got worse and more concentrated. We all started to talk about the smell. We all had our theories as to what the smell was, but as we sat there I got more and more curious. I noticed that there was a girl missing from Audrey's team. I turned to one of the other moms and said that I was going to go look for the source of that smell, seeing as it was getting worse and coach seemed not to care about what it was.

As girls came back and forth from the gym to the locker room it just wafted the smell around. I looked into the office. Didn't see anything. I looked in the lobby. Didn't see anything. I looked in the waiting room off the lobby. Didn't see anything. So I decided to go outside and get a breath of fresh air. I looked back in the door to find the mom I was sitting next to also looking around. She checked the bathroom as I was walking back into the building. I decided to look back into the waiting room and noticed the entire thing was empty with the exception of another mom and her son playing on the floor, but they were talking to someone. I poked my head in and looked all the way inside and noticed the missing girl from Audrey's team.

She sat there and looked up with her big eyes, shrink wrapped with tears. The smell was all the more pungent now, and I fought my gag reflex. I turned back to the mom with me and said that this poor girl pooped herself. The smell was not that of healthy poop. It was the smell of the type you get when you are sick beyond belief. Upon further review I could see the pooling in this poor girl's chair.

I text messaged one of the coaches in the other room and told him where the source of the smell was. They all had no idea that this poor girl was sitting in the waiting room with a pair of pants and a plastic chair, full of human excrement. The coach phoned her parents. They were sending her sister. This poor girl couldn't wait for anyone, she needed to get cleaned up. I told her coach that I would clean her up, but a male, in a bathroom with a little girl, that needs to be stripped down and cleaned up, would probably not be a good idea. So another mom offered, but by the time we all got organized, her sister had arrived. She got all cleaned up and about 30 minutes later they left discreetly as the team kept practicing. They never knew that their team mate had totally disqualified herself. They all smelled it in the hallway, but thanks to some quick thinking parents and coaches, they never knew who it was.

Now I feel terrible for this girl. As I sit and think about how this whole thing played out, my feelings of pity for this girl is quickly turning into anger at this child's parents.

I spoke about this with some of the other team moms and come to find out, this poor child is 1 of 10 children in her household. She and her sister [whom is also on my daughter's team] were adopted by this family. I am not sure, but I also think a majority of the children in this household were adopted. Now I always have respect for a family who adopts, but as I dig into this situation, it seems to be that the mother and father are using the foster care and adoption system to live off of [read: Obama's base].

What mother in their right mind would allow their child to go to cheer practice/school/out of the house if they are sick? What parent in their right mind would get a call from a cheer coach saying their child has pooped themselves at practice and send a 17 year old to clean up the mess, let alone a 17 year old who had just gotten out of the hospital because she lost feeling in her legs after a cheer practice herself without explanation?

These parents need to be smacked. They are unemployed and taking government assistance to care for children that need a good home and not one that is using them.

I feel for these children. I only know 3 of them out of the 10, and these girls just want to be loved. Their parents got them involved in cheer to help develop them socially because the situation they were coming out of was abusive. Their development was severely retarded. I am not saying retarded in the sense that they have mental retardation issues, I say retarded as in, this girl is 6, but has the mental capacity for a 2-3 year old. She has come a long way in a year, but to have a 17 year old taking these girls to and from practice is bullshit. The parents need to be there to support their children. They are not working so to say they don't have the time, or that they are at work is not an excuse.

We as a society allow this to happen. It's the mentality that everyone should be in the same playing field [read: socialist]. We want the poor to not be poor, and we want the rich to share what they have worked for. Because of this we allow ignorant and opportunistic people the ability to adopt more and more children or give birth to more and more children who don't have the capability to care for these kids properly. Welfare keeps these families afloat. These people are holding onto a life raft without kicking their feet to keep themselves afloat.

I don't know about you, but I want my life raft back. Who knows when I might need it myself.


Patrick said...

You and the other helping parents are incredible role models and your children will prosper for having you as parents. I totally agree with you about the foster-care family and the welfare "life raft". I know I got myself in my situation, but if I didn't have to support all those slackers with a quarter of my pay, I might have a fighting chance to better myself and my situation before the ripe young age of "died of old age". For those people sucking me and every other worker dry, get a job damnit! You don't deserve our money! What have you done for anyone other than yourself?! Nothing! I bite my thumb in your general direction!

~K said...

Your story makes me freakin' furious. For two reasons 1)Our Foster care system is probably so overloaded they would let a family take children and 2) I knew someone just like this who used the Foster Care system to further themselves and I hated them for it. I can't even begin to think about the embarrassment and trauma this poor girl went through. I too have a daughter that loves cheer and you know what as much as I like it when she cheers. It is just not that important. If she is sick she stays home I don't care if it is a game, a competition or what, but you are right some moms are living vicariously through their daughters.

Julie said...

OK you didn't mention yesterday that she was sick. now I feel worse for her, and her parents are fuck-wits. I can't stop thinking about that poor girl and how embarassed she must have been. And now the parents that suck so bad, who adopts 10 children and then doesn't work?? Assumes that the government will take care of them?? I hate people like that.

calicolyst said...

I understand that cheerleading can be intimidating, but sheesh.