Stressful

The holidays are bad enough.  With the stressing over cooking dinners, making sure the house is clean, and just living through the holidays in retail; we don't need anything else stressing us out. 

Unfortunately, for my family, the holidays are a mixed blessing.  On one hand, this is where I make most of my money for Christmas gifts, bills, and over all holiday cheer, but on the other hand I am never around.  On one hand the family gets together, but on the other hand we notice the ones we lost over the years.

The holidays are always a stressful time, but for me they are exceptionally stressful.  Back in 2000 I lost my 6 year old cousin to a brain aneurysm just a few short weeks after Thanksgiving.  In 2005 I lost my Grandfather just a few days before my Grandmother's birthday on December 12.  Two major unexpected deaths during the thick of the holiday season.  There was a time when I wished December would just be canceled.

Well today we can add one more to the mix.  My sister-in-law lost her Grandfather today.  A death felt very close to home.  It's never easy to say good-bye, and it's exceptionally difficult to watch it all happen in hospice at home, but as of today, her Grandfather is in a much better place.

He has been fighting a sickness for sometime and now he no longer has to fight.  He is comfortable.  He is at peace.

The bad side of all of this is the timing.  Just a few days away from Thanksgiving.  Needless to say, our Thanksgiving plans with my brother and his family have been canceled so that his family can mourn and heal.  Keeping it low key.  Trying to keep all that stress at bay.  It's hard enough to say good-bye, but let alone say good-bye and entertaining guests or trekking all over the city when all you want to do is cry.

Jenn and I are replanning Thanksgiving plans, and it gives us time to get the Christmas stuff out and put it all up, and to get the house cleaned up for our friends coming from out of town.  Our Thanksgiving plans really are on the Sunday following when we get to cook for our friends from Washington D.C. and also friends we don't get to see very often.

So let's hope my sister-in-law and her family can mourn peacefully and make the best out of the holiday season.

I'm not overly religious.  I could be considered as spiritual.  I don't subscribe to any particular school of thought, but it's days like today when I find myself thinking about mortality.  I wish my Brother and his family well.